The Amputee Policeman

Real talk from an 18 year cop

Archive for the month “December, 2014”

Back in the Hospital Again!

Well I made it back to this crazy place, my second home. I haven’t been back in 7 years and though that was fine by me, my MRSA felt differently about that and decided to sabotage my routine and sometimes boring life.  For the record, I’ll take my slow and boring life over the excitement of the fast-paced hospital lifestyle.  Anyway, I’m here and had my 39th procedure related to my wreck.  Other than the fact that my anatomy is so screwed up that even a seasoned doctor can’t read my x- rays, the nurses have been fairly nice….  Yawn….  no really, yawn.  I’m still not getting any sleep!  Keep checking back and I’ll give you the rundown of my latest stay.   Until then, I want to leave you with a picture of pancakes that they crafted from cardboard boxes in the kitchen.  Eat up!


I think that’s bacon on the side next to the board cakes!  I just didn’t want to say it too loud in case it woke up. 


11 Best Responses I’ve Had as an Amputee

One more time, before we completely forget about summer! I think my leg and I are hibernating this year!

The Amputee Policeman


 1.A guy walking into a hardware store violently slammed his body into a doorframe after becoming deeply hypnotizes by the sight of my prosthetic leg.  You are getting very sleeepy.  Or cluuumsy!

2. The free beer that flowed  all night long at a Catholic church picnic after I sorta kinda told everybody I was attacked by a shark and it ate my leg.

3. The parents watching their kids in my karate class jumped out of their seats to help me after I fell down.  Despite the fact we were practicing takedowns.  And everyone was falling!

4. Being laughed at by an entire school bus full of kids after I fell on the sidewalk in front of my house when first learning to walk.  Impeccable timing!

5. When an Asian man asked me what happened to my leg and after I responded “a wreck”, he continued to insist I said…

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